[ With his feet now a little bit warmer, Vash draws his knees up to his chest, still leaning fully against Wolfwood's side. He can feel how tense Wolfwood is from the contact, but selfishly he doesn't try to move away. He has false memories of rescuing a kitten here, once. It had hissed and scratched, shaking with tension and rage, but in the end it had just wanted to be warm. He would never say as much to Wolfwood, but Vash thinks he's a little bit like that.
In contrast to Wolfwood, he's completely relaxed, his head listing a little bit against Wolfwood's shoulder. He smells... nice. Much less like cigarettes than Vash would have expected. ]
Who else would have said it? I'm the only one here. [ Vash dares to angle his head up and flash Wolfwood a cheeky little grin.
He shifts just enough to make room for the hand trying to sneak behind his back. He can feel the chill of Wolfwood's hand through the fabric of his shirt, just above the line where it's ridden up. Wolfwood's chest rises with his next breath, and Vash thinks he can feel his heartbeat press up against him, but it's probably all in his head.
It's only when Wolfwood speaks that he tenses for the first time. Suddenly, he feels trapped, his heart hammering. His breathing is still slow and even, but only because Vash is controlling it carefully. He makes himself relax the way he makes himself smile sometimes.
Because of me, he ought to say. It was exactly like this, and I destroyed our hope. I destroyed your chance at this life.
He ought to confess.
Vash swallows, his mouth moving for a moment with no sound, and then he turns his face further toward Wolfwood's shoulder. He just wants another minute. Another second of this. ] What would you do, if you knew?
[ Wolfwood keeps himself distracted so to keep from dwelling on the very physical and very present reality of the situation that he's found himself in. So that he doesn't try to catalogue each point that they meet between flesh and metal. And so that he doesn't wonder how long it's been since since he was pressed so casually against another person without intent to harm lurking under his skin, because it hasn't been that long at all.
Roberto's jeep had been roomy, but not so roomy that Vash and Wolfwood hadn't bumped limbs in the backseat as they lounged in the heat. Granted, he'd been deceiving Vash then, actions all wrapped up in betrayal.
So maybe this is the first time in some long years after all.
His attention is drawn back when Vash's demeanour shifts, near imperceptibly if not for how close they are. His voice is as soft as ever, but it still feels different. ]
Ain't thought that far. [ He's not thinking along the same lines as Vash, so he's not quite sure what might be bothering him, dismayed that something might've overtaken his previous cheek, even if it had been at his expense.
He glances at him out of the corner of his eye before looking ahead again, thoughtful. ]
They must've been pretty smart if they had all that tech before they went into space. If they couldn't figure out how to keep their planet from dyin' maybe there ain't anything anyone can do.
[ He can feel Wolfwood's gaze on him, but Vash keeps his eyes downcast. He can usually read Wolfwood, but it goes both ways, and at the moment he doesn't trust himself to look at Wolfwood and not break down in confession. He's not even a priest, so Vash doesn't understand what it is about Wolfwood that always makes him want to be honest, even when it's ugly.
He bites into his lower lip, worrying at it. He can feel Wolfwood's voice rumbling in his chest as he speaks, and somehow he's not surprised that Wolfwood has found the worst possible outcome to brood over.
Maybe he won't confess this time, Vash decides. Guilt can eat him alive, but he wants to be selfish, just this once. ]
Maybe it was too late when they understood how precious it was but... [ Vash rolls his head back against Wolfwood's shoulder to look up at him. ] I don't think it always has to be that way. Maybe this time, the story can be different.
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In contrast to Wolfwood, he's completely relaxed, his head listing a little bit against Wolfwood's shoulder. He smells... nice. Much less like cigarettes than Vash would have expected. ]
Who else would have said it? I'm the only one here. [ Vash dares to angle his head up and flash Wolfwood a cheeky little grin.
He shifts just enough to make room for the hand trying to sneak behind his back. He can feel the chill of Wolfwood's hand through the fabric of his shirt, just above the line where it's ridden up. Wolfwood's chest rises with his next breath, and Vash thinks he can feel his heartbeat press up against him, but it's probably all in his head.
It's only when Wolfwood speaks that he tenses for the first time. Suddenly, he feels trapped, his heart hammering. His breathing is still slow and even, but only because Vash is controlling it carefully. He makes himself relax the way he makes himself smile sometimes.
Because of me, he ought to say. It was exactly like this, and I destroyed our hope. I destroyed your chance at this life.
He ought to confess.
Vash swallows, his mouth moving for a moment with no sound, and then he turns his face further toward Wolfwood's shoulder. He just wants another minute. Another second of this. ] What would you do, if you knew?
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Roberto's jeep had been roomy, but not so roomy that Vash and Wolfwood hadn't bumped limbs in the backseat as they lounged in the heat. Granted, he'd been deceiving Vash then, actions all wrapped up in betrayal.
So maybe this is the first time in some long years after all.
His attention is drawn back when Vash's demeanour shifts, near imperceptibly if not for how close they are. His voice is as soft as ever, but it still feels different. ]
Ain't thought that far. [ He's not thinking along the same lines as Vash, so he's not quite sure what might be bothering him, dismayed that something might've overtaken his previous cheek, even if it had been at his expense.
He glances at him out of the corner of his eye before looking ahead again, thoughtful. ]
They must've been pretty smart if they had all that tech before they went into space. If they couldn't figure out how to keep their planet from dyin' maybe there ain't anything anyone can do.
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He bites into his lower lip, worrying at it. He can feel Wolfwood's voice rumbling in his chest as he speaks, and somehow he's not surprised that Wolfwood has found the worst possible outcome to brood over.
Maybe he won't confess this time, Vash decides. Guilt can eat him alive, but he wants to be selfish, just this once. ]
Maybe it was too late when they understood how precious it was but... [ Vash rolls his head back against Wolfwood's shoulder to look up at him. ] I don't think it always has to be that way. Maybe this time, the story can be different.